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Registered Psychotherapists (CRPO) · Virtual & phone session across Ontario · Free 15-min consultation · Direct billing for select insurance providers ·
SOUND FAMILIAR?
When hurt comes from someone close
Some of the deepest hurt comes from the people we needed most. A parent who was unpredictable or hard to reach. A home where you learned to read the room to keep things calm. A partner who belittled you, controlled you or broke your trust.
Experiences like these can influence what feels safe or familiar in relationships, sometimes long after the relationship or situation has changed. You may notice yourself expecting rejection, struggling to trust, staying alert to changes in someone’s mood, or finding certain relationship dynamics especially difficult.
Relational trauma doesn’t always come from one defining event, and you don’t need a label for your experience to matter. Therapy can help you understand what happened, how it may be affecting you now, and what you want to do differently moving forward.
WHERE IT STARTS
Where relational trauma can come from
Childhood and caregivers
Early relational trauma develops within relationships we depended on as children: a caregiver who was unpredictable, frightening, critical, dismissive or absent, or a home where you had to stay alert, look after others or hide your own needs to keep things calm. These experiences can shape the internal blueprint we carry about love, safety and ourselves.
Partners and close relationships
Adult relationships can leave lasting hurt too: a partner, family member or friend who was controlling, demeaning or emotionally unsafe, or a relationship where closeness and hurt kept arriving together.
Betrayal and infidelity
Discovering a partner's affair, or another deep betrayal, can split life into before and after. You may move between shock, rage, grief and numbness, replay timelines and messages, and wonder how you didn't see it. Whether you found out last week or years ago, and whether you're staying, leaving or still unsure, you deserve support that's focused on you.
HOW IT CAN SHOW UP
How relational trauma can show up
Feeling on alert in relationships, scanning for signs of rejection, anger or deception.
Finding it hard to trust others, or your own perceptions and instincts.
Shame or self-blame, even for things that weren't your choice.
Shutting down, people-pleasing or pulling away when closeness feels risky.
Strong reactions that seem bigger than the moment.
Finding yourself drawn to relationships that feel painfully familiar.
UNDERSTANDING THE PATTERN
Why the past can repeat
That last point is something we explore in Why We Repeat the Past: the unconscious pull to recreate early emotional experiences, especially the unresolved ones.
When early environments were unpredictable, the nervous system can learn to expect chaos, and a later betrayal can feel like confirmation of a fear you've carried for a long time.
That isn't a flaw in your character. You are not broken; you're human, and your system adapted to what it faced.
OUR APPROACH
How individual therapy can help
Therapy isn’t about pushing you toward forgiveness, confrontation, reconciliation, or ending a relationship. It gives you space to understand what happened, how it may still be affecting you, and what you would like to work on. Depending on your needs, therapy may involve:
Learning strategies for managing difficult emotions and responses to triggers.
Exploring how past relationship experiences may influence current thoughts, feelings, or behaviours.
Identifying beliefs about yourself or relationships that may have developed through difficult experience.
Becoming more aware of your needs, boundaries, and responses within relationships.
Exploring recurring relationship patterns and considering different ways of responding.
Working through thoughts and feelings about a current or past relationship without being directed toward a particular decision.
What the first few sessions involve
1
Your first session
Getting to know you: what's been happening and what you'd like to be different. You share at your own pace.
2
The next few sessions
3
Mapping your patterns together and outlining your goals, usually with one small, practical thing to try each week.
From there
We balance insight and skills, checking in regularly about what's helping and adjusting as we go!
Safety and Support
Individual therapy is not a crisis or emergency service. If you’re currently experiencing abuse, threats, violence, or immediate concerns about your safety, please call 911 in an emergency or connect with an appropriate crisis service. You can also find crisis lines and other community supports in our community Resource Guide.
YOUR THERAPIST
Salena Javdan, Registered Psychotherapist
Salena works with relational trauma, including the lasting impact of difficult early relationships, betrayal, and infidelity. Her trauma- and attachment-informed approach focuses on understanding how these experiences may be affecting you now, developing ways to manage difficult emotions and triggers, and working toward a greater sense of safety, self-trust, and choice in your relationships at your pace.
CBT · DBT · Attachment-informed · Compassion-focused · Trauma-informed
PRACTICAL DETAILS
Getting started with Atria
Virtual across Ontario
Sessions take place online through Jane, our secure booking and video platform, from anywhere you have privacy in Ontario. Phone sessions are also available.
Fees
Individual sessions are $150 for a 50-minute session. Many extended health plans cover psychotherapy with a Registered Psychotherapist; check you plans for details.
Free 15-min consults.
A short, no-pressure call to talk about what's bringing you in, ask questions, and see whether working together feels like a fit.
Not a crisis service
If you're in crisis, call or text 9-8-8, call 911, or go to your nearest emergency department. See our crisis resources.
FAQ
Frequently asked questions
Virtual Therapy Across Ontario
Providing virtual therapy and counselling services to clients across Ontario, including Toronto, Mississauga, Vaughan, Richmondhill, Markham, Hamilton, London, Kitchener-Waterloo, and surrounding communities.